December 2010
1 post
March 2010
1 post
February 2010
1 post
Scissor me!
– Michael Scott (via jackiegarlich)
January 2010
1 post
Here’s the thing. When a company screws up, best thing to do is call a press...
– Michael Scott (via jackiegarlich)
December 2009
5 posts
What is it like being single? I like it! I like starting each day with a sense...
– Michael Scott (via jackiegarlich)
Ho ho ho! Why pay more to sit next to old Tranny Claus over there, when you can...
– Michael Scott (via jackiegarlich)
Jim: You can’t yell out “I need this, I need this” as you pin down an employee...
– (via jackiegarlich)
Zyan: I’m Zyan. I’m Mikyla’s younger brother.
Michael Scott: Well Zyan I am...
– (via jackiegarlich)
I just—I fell in love with these kids. And I didn’t want to see them fall victim...
– Michael Scott (via jackiegarlich)
November 2009
17 posts
So, yesterday Dwight found half a joint in the parking lot. Which is...
– Jim Halpert, The Office (via jackiegarlich)
Jim’s a good kid, he can handle a lot. But sometimes you have to call in a...
– Michael Scott (via jackiegarlich)
Dwight Schrute: Michael, what is the meaning of this email that everyone got?
...
– The Office, Episode: “Murder” (via jackiegarlich)
I’m a little worried that I may have asked out Naughty Nelly instead of Erin....
– Andrew Bernard (via jackiegarlich)
What is wrong with these people? They have no willpower. I went— I once went...
– Michael Scott, The Office: Weight Loss episode (via jackiegarlich)
Andy: No. I really Schruted it.
Michael Scott: What?
Andy: Schruted it. It’s...
– The Office.
I really Schruted it today.
(via jackiegarlich)
Hey everybody, he’s not in the men’s room. Although the seat was warm, so we may...
– Meredith, The Office (via jackiegarlich)
Truthfully, it wasn’t the way he fell in, it was… how long it took him to get...
– Jim Halpert (via jackiegarlich)
October 2009
11 posts
I don’t need to be friends with Pam. I have plenty of female friends. My mom....
– Michael Scott (via jackiegarlich)
You know, I really would’ve appreciated a heads up that you were into dating...
– Dwight Schrute (via jackiegarlich)
Kevin: I wouldn’t last in jail, Oscar, I’m not like you.
Oscar: What’s that...
– (via jackiegarlich)
I am actually great with old women. I n fact, for the longest time my best...
– Michael Scott
The office is tonight!
(via jackiegarlich)
jackiegarlich:
Oscar: What are you doing?
Kevin: I’m trying to decide if I have time to pee.
Oscar: How long do you take to pee?
Kevin: The peeing is fast, Oscar. It’s getting my tie back on.
-The Office